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LoginDating, courtship, going out, going steady — whatever you called it it was a different concept in the s than the internet laden landscape of the 21st century. For the young women of the mid-century courtship and dating was a group affair. Dating meant hanging out with a boy, having him walk you home, and perhaps a kiss good night. But just as you or I might recount tremendously different dating experiences, so too did the women in this study. Their naivety they often attributed to how little they knew about the opposite sex, expectations around courtship, and most notably their limited knowledge about sex and contraception.
Most people assume that everyone out in the Dating World has the same goals in mind. We believe it is the Right Way and the Only Way to live life and have relationships. These folks want to find The Right One , settle down, marry, have kids, or not have kids and spend the rest of their lives with someone. They may have started out being a Commitment Dater but have given up over time as their relationships have ended badly. They may have a secret hope that they could still meet The Right One but have become used to having a series of short relationships. These relationships might last anywhere from a couple of months to a couple of years.
When it comes to finding love and matters of the heart, practice makes perfect. As a framework, Ury, a behavioral scientist, developed the three dating tendencies to help identify behaviors that might be hindering daters from finding the love they want. According to Ury, the tendencies or dating styles are the Romanticizer, the Maximizer, and the Hesitator.
We now have what I like to call 13 stages of dating. Instead, they feel out of alignment with you. Having mismatched expectations can feel awkward both ways. Here is a rundown of each stage and what you should be able to expect. This is the obvious first time you meet someone.
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